I want a candy bar named after me

I'm torn. I'm a Dodgers fan, pure and simple, but secondly I'm a Red Sox fan. And not one of those bandwagon-douchebags who started liking them after 2004; I liked them in 2003, thank you very much. So as the former, I am pissed as hell that we finished fourth in the division, and convinced that it was all Grady Little's terrible managing. I don't think any manager was more polarizing throughout the MLB. Every single move that he made could either be hailed as monumentally brilliant, or more likely terribly retarded. He'd always leave a pitcher in too long (see Broxton's five runs given up to the Padres way back at the season's start), underutilize Mike Liberthal (see Russell Martin's tombstone), and play Juan Pierre too much (about 162 games too much).



On top of that, the Rockies and D-Backs -- both appearing in the league AFTER I WAS BORN -- are gonna be playing in the NLCS. So I'm praying for a tie, although after the whole Coolbaugh incident, and the fact that the Rockies actually demonstrated some seldom-seen human decency in sports by donating their profits, I won't mind the Rockies making it. But a tie would be the best.
As for the the AL, it's the AL Dodgers against the Indians. This is a matchup I'm excited to see. Two dynamite offenses, relatively good pitching staffs with the AL's Cy Young candidates as aces. And Pronk candy bars! (I tried to find a picture of one, but Malley's Chocolates doesn't have any on their website. You can order them here though.

But seriously, so many matchups in the ALCS. Beckett and Sabathia. Papi and Pronk. With those guys plus Manny, Youk, et al, there has to be more fat than in Fight Club. Granted there are some bad players too, obviously all of which played for the Dodgers. Drew, Lugo, and Gagne. This series is really about whether Gagne or Borowski will blow more. And we've also got some nifty plot lines. Manny playing against his former team, and whether he actually decides to play. Trot Nixon sitting and watching against his former team. And Kenny Lofton being really really old. (Thank god Kenny Lofton is in this series. That means I get to see more of that DHL commercial. I've watched that too many times, but each time I find something new and hilarious. By far my favorite is the blatant stereotyped gong that you hear at the end.)

Sidenote: It's currently 9:15 at night here in Berkeley. I'm sitting in my room, listening to music. All of a sudden, I hear a leaf-blower. I got up to check, and it turns out that some dude is just running around our courtyard chasing after someone with a leaf-blower. That guy is the man. I must find out where he bought that leaf-blower.

Anyway, I'm convinced that the Red Sox are too good. They literally barreled through the Angels (granted the Angels didn't stand a chance after people realized that Vlad Guerrero hit more home runs than the rest of his team, and that Reggie Willits wasn't in fact black) and will probably barrel through the Indians since Charlie Sheen isn't on their roster. Unless Francona has a cerebral hemorrhage and starts putting in Gagne, I expect to see the Red Sox quickly meet the Rockies in the World Series.

However, to bring things full-circle, who did the Indians beat? That's right, the dreaded Yankees, most of whom should be within a year of collecting their pensions. We all knew they would collapse: A-Rod just needed to have a monster year and then flail in the playoffs so he could severe all his ties and fly to Chicago. Clemens is beyond washed up, as are Mussina, Pettitte, Rivera, Damon, Williams...oops, forgot he didn't play since they wanted to start getting younger. As a consequence, according to ESPN the skipper's getting pushed overboard. Yup, Joe Torre is going to be out of work, and undoubtedly Joe Girardi is going to cut his skyrocketing TV analyst career short in order to take up the reins. But, not going to lie, I'm kind of sad. It's the end of an era for Joe in New York...

...But who's to say he's finished? Joe Torre is, if there were such a possible comparison, comparable to Phil Jackson.
Both managed the most dominant teams of their respective eras, albeit Joe's have been on decline, and both featured some of the greatest athletes in Jordan, Clemens, and Jeter, to ever play the games. So, just like Jackson, why can't Torre come to LA and make the Dodgers into the contender the Yankees were? He's got some of the brightest young stars in Martin, Andre Ethier, Matt Kemp, Chad Billingsley, Andy LaRoche, Tony Abreu (...do I really need to keep going?) and they would all clearly benefit from having his coaching. And then he's got some of the oldest, quickly fading stars in the league with Nomar, Officer Kent, and Gonzo (all of whom I would prefer not to see on the team next year) who he might be able to use in one way or another. And he's got a fan-base which is just waiting to return to stardom. It has to happen!
I'm telling you, the parallels are unreal.