In Case You Missed It

So I haven't posted in a while. I don't really have any good excuses like "I was swamped with homework" or something dumb like that. I was just playing a lot of Halo 3. But anyway, here's a quick look at the only important things to happen in sports recently.

• One free taco from Taco Bell*

This was the only important thing that came out of the world series.
* Free taco was not actually free. I had to buy something else to get it. So it was more of a 2-for-1 taco.

• The Los Angeles Galaxy failed to make the playoffs despite an admirable run to close the season.

The MLS, realizing what a financial disaster this would be, just decided to cancel the playoffs and give the championship trophy to David Beckham. Not the Galaxy, just Beckham. In good knightly fashion, he has allowed the teams that qualified for the playoffs to continue playing "for, you know, second place."

• Martina Hingis cheats, denies it, and then promptly retires.

Martina, just a hint: if you get accused of something you believe you didn't do, despite what both of your test samples say, pretty much the LAST thing you want to do is retire. Because that pretty much just seals the deal in the public's eye. Well, that, and those two positive test results. But then again, it's women's tennis, and people only care about how you look, not really whether or not you were cheating. I don't even know if you were that great of a tennis player in the first place. In fact, I didn't even know women played tennis. Are the rules the same as men's tennis? Do they even keep score? I'll have to look into this some more.

• Navy beats Notre Dame, blah blah blah 46 years, blah blah blah, price of eggs and milk, THERE WAS A TOTALLY AWESOME SACK.

Since I gave up on college football, I can now just focus on cool stuff like this. Seriously, think about how the quarterback felt when he saw that replay. I imagine he said something along the lines of what the rest of America thought: "Holy shit! Are you fucking kidding me?!"

• Two records that won't be broken for a long time, if ever, were set in the same game yesterday.

Adrian Peterson ran for 296 yards, which is absolutely absurd, especially against a Chargers defense that, while they aren't as good as they were last year, did not seem like the group to give up the most yards to one player in NFL history. Unfortunately he was wearing one of the ugliest jerseys in the NFL, and I'm not just saying that because I hate the Vikings. Those things are legitimately hideous. While that record could feasibly be broken, I don't see how the other one can. Antonio Cromartie ran back a missed field goal 109 yards. He was practically out of bounds when he caught the ball, so I don't really see how anyone could get a 110-yard return. Impressive performances by both of these guys.

• The Biggest Football Game Ever (In The Regular Season), aka Super Bowl XLI 1/2, aka Manning v. Brady, Round 10, aka It Sucks For The Houston Area Because They Have To Watch The Texans-Raiders Game Instead Of This One, was played, with the Patriots beating the Colts 24-20.

This game was incredibly hyped, and deservedly so, I suppose, as both teams have looked incredible early on. The game was fairly exciting, although it was not the fantasy bonanza I was hoping for. Did the absences of Marvin Harrison and Tony Ugoh hurt the Colts? Probably. But it was their defense that let them down in the end after doing such a good job of limiting the Patriots offense the whole game. Oh well. I found myself having a hard time getting into this game. I just really didn't care that much. Although it was nice to see Belichick not look like a homeless person. And in other "two guys who are dominating the crap out of their sport" news...

• Even though you still don't care about NASCAR, this has been one of the most exciting finishes ever.
  

Jeff Gordon and Jimmie Johnson combined to win 10 of the first 26 races, which is a fairly impressive percentage. Since the Chase has started, they have won 5 of 8, those 5 all coming in the 5 most recent races. With only 2 races left and Johnson clinging to a small 30 point lead, you might want to tune in next Sunday. Not that you will.

• More "things I like that you probably don't care about:" the Miami University hockey team is 8-0, and the only undefeated team in the top 10.

Our captain, Ryan Jones, has grown his hair out so much that he is actually starting to resemble a lion. He is also tied for the second-most points in the nation with 11 through 8 games.


That's all that's really been going on. The NBA started, but no one really cares because it's boring until February or so, and Kobe is still on the Lakers. NHL games are still being played, but nothing much of note has happened. College basketball gets underway soon, which is a very good thing. End.