Wednesday, December 5, 2007

It's Business Time

I wish that life was simpler. Like the finals exams I've got to take next week. Or taxes. Or football penalty calls.

Fortunately, ACC refs are dumbing down the latter to make life a little bit better. While I was killing brain cells watching the retarded affair that is Pac-10 Football, I could've been catching referee Ron Cherry explaining penalties more eloquently than Robert Frost prose.



Let's hope all penalties start getting called like this.

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Saturday, December 1, 2007

WHAT THE FUCK BELANIE!

Fuck Trees. Fuck the color red. And Fuck Stanford. Every year Cal plays Stanford. And in the midst of a 5-game winning streak, most current Berkeleyians simply look at the last game on the calendar and write it off as an easy win. However, in a season where winning went from easy to impossible, I sat watching the Big Game and felt that punching myself in the ballsack repeatedly would be less painful.

Before the game I'd lost all effective interest in college football, after all umpteenth upsets during the season. Sure, it was the 25th anniversary of the greatest feat in football history, but since the game was at Stanford the douchebag announcers discounted the entire event suggesting that there were "forward laterals." Really? Well you work for Versus network. Yeah, go fuck yourself.

I'm sorry for anyone who watched the game on television. First off, because both teams legitimately played awful (Alex Mack still owns though). Second, because Versus is a terrible network (you'll notice how there wasn't a first down line on the field half the time, let alone the down and yardage information). Third, because Nate Longshore was QBing. This picture is indicative of what Cal endures.

Some interesting stats for the game (all Cal related, because i don't care about Stanford's and I'm not going to look up the specifics):
- 252 total yards in the first half. 7 in the third quarter.
- 2,613 penalties for infinity yards.
- 2 INTs, both (surprisingly) in the 4th quarter.

So Longshore's 4th quarter numbers continue to impress. 1 TD, 14 INTs. He almost looked like he would drive us in for a tie, but when has he ever. I'm going to write Jeff Tedford with my sterling advice that I've been preaching all year, and hopefully it'll get through that ~2.5 million dollar a year salary of his. Please Coach, GIVE KEVIN RILEY A CHANCE!

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